How are you?Okay.Okay.I hear you.Breathe.Good, good.
Hey, have you noticed any trail/road hazards lately?What!?You too!?Me too!
Here are some trail hazards I have noticed while out with
spinny-wheeled forms of transport.
Yes, there are some dangers.This guy was rabid distempered.We avoided him and his swarm of insects like the distemper rabies.After he drove Toddler Snot and myself away
from our pedal- and/or push-powered means of conveyance he foamed at the mouth
and clawed at the air convincingly.
Toddler
Snot thought it was fascinating and kept moving in the raccoon’s direction, so
I had to redirect and distract him.I
kept a watch on our frothy friend out of the corner of my eye.While there is nothing particularly funny
about a rabiddistempered raccoon, it was pretty funny when he got
aboard our trike after a few unsuccessful attempts and finally succeeded in rolling it
into the creek.Don’t ride rabid distempered.
I have also observed some other recent trail obstacles –
mostly auto parts.
Another event I’ve recently experienced was purchasing a
used Strider bicycle.
Since his trike had been jacked by a raccoon, I figured we’d
try something else for him to pedal roll on.Toddler Snot is bound to love it, and I’ll
give you his review and updates on his progress.
Well what else is happening?
Here is a website I have not noticed before. It's the Nebraska Cycling Association! Apparently you can ride bicycles fast in a variety of formats and venues here in Nebraska. Mostly cyclopcross and a few mountainous bicycling events. Then there's the top secret, unrelated and possibly entyrely factitious Cyclops Mountains bicycle smack down. You may pass, be passed, piss, be or get pissed, etc. Competition brings out the best fluids in/on all of us! I actually enjoy participating in some racy activities from time to time, so I'll let you know how this budding relationship develops.
In the meantime, let's all meet up in the Cyclops. I hear a balloon approach to the starting line is quite soothing to the distempered amongst us.
Hello to you.I hope
you are doing well.I had a change in
plans and was able to make it out for some owl riding this past weekend.“How did this happen?” you ask?You don’t ask?
Well boo-whooo!Whoooo!
Here is a video of the OWL Ride from a handy side street:
It was a neat vantage point.
I did not initially think I would be able to make it out for
the ride because Teen Snot is typically at work on Saturday eves.This week it turned out she did not have to
work, but I didn’t find out until Saturday eve itself! If there is one thing I have noticed, it is that parents are nearly as oblivious of others and their plans as teenagers. Thereupon I sounded a quick owlish alert to
my OWL-loving friend Rich.We quickly
flew from our perches and eventually alit here at the Crescent Moon –
a quaint
watering hole conveniently located upon the OWL route.But before I made it that far I stopped to
enjoy some nightly views, misinform passers-by, and take a bad photo.
“What’s the ride for?” a curious, gangly fellow inquired.
“For fun!” I responded, nothing else coming readily to
mindedly.
“Fun?”
“Yep.” I confirmed, more confidently.
Well, it wasn’t long before I began reflecting upon this
unlikelihood. Fun is something we midwesterners look upon with suspicion and/or disdain. Furthermore, I do not believe I have
ever partaken in a non-competitive group bicycling event that did not support a
charitable organization of some sort.So
here is my attempt to rectify the fuck $#%@ out of my blatant untruth.
The OWL Ride raises funds for the Meyers Foundation for
Disabilities (MFD).MFD improves the quality
of life for those with disabilities by providing financial and volunteer
support to help adults with disabilities engage in fun, social activities at
the Munroe-Meyer Institute that they otherwise might not be able to participate
in.Not only does this provide a great
opportunity for our disabled friends, but it allows their families a small
break in their caregiving routine.Here is some more information about this wonderful organization.
Our friend Nick joined us on this night flight.As Nick arrived so too did a fellow in a Gatormobile.He informed us that the water stops and
police presence were being discontinued.
“You guys’ll be alright, right!?” he queried jocularly.
“I think so.”I
replied uncertainly.
I had a delicious Belgian beer.
We conversed. We examined the route map. We eventually departed.
We stopped at Beer and Loathing.They also had a New Begium bicycle.
I once drank several beers to earn some raffle tickets to try to win one of these sweet cruisers. They raffle them off annually or
so.
We cycled on, occasionally noting some other bicyclers,
generally moving in a similar direction.
Eventually we made it back to the beginning and had a beer
at the Storz Trophy Room Brewery and Restaurant.
Rich and Nick said there weren’t as many people
as last year, and, therefore, not quite as festive. I think everyone had fun. And Rich told me about this freaky video.
If we can make toast with bicycles, what else can we do?! Perhaps a microwave?!? I think there really is hope for the human and/or bicycle race! Let's toast! BSO
I went outside to walk over to a restaurant to meet my dad
for lunch today and I squinted into the overcast sky as if I were gazing into a
blazing Washington forest.It was then
that I knew I had been wearing my safety glasses a lot.This made me smile as I squinted.A tear of discomfort and joy watered my
narrow eyes and I remembered that it is the joyful Eye Injury Prevention month
of July.
I also have been enjoying the fabulous Action Cam that I
received from Mrs. Snot for my birthday awhile back.I attached it to the side of my helmet as an
afterthought this morning before two-wheeling off to the ball bearing balancing
shop.
It flopped around ineffectively on
my way to work.Then I tried again on
the way home.It seemed to be going very
well until I noticed via my shadow that the mounting screw had not been
sufficiently tightened and my Action Cam was now aimed floppily off to the side
at a somewhat obtuse angle.Oh, the
childlike joy of being a newbie at something!
So what’s new with you?You don’t say!Isn’t that the
way!I know, I know!Right!?
Now settle back and enjoy this eye safety video from the
comfort of your environs.
July 11
Tonight is the Owl Ride, which is I am sure will be
enjoyable for all.I will not be
participating because I am staying at home with Toddler Snot.We’ll be fine.I may get him out there on a Strider or a
pony or something next year.Speaking of
Striders, hold on for a minute I’ve gotta check Craigslist.
Sweet!$40 ain’t
bad.We’ll see how that pans out.
Alright, please let me know when you would like to meet up
for a ride and I’ll be sure to join you and/or make a counter-offer, toddlers welcome.
Happy Fourth of July weekend!I hope that you are enjoying it.
I am doing alright, thanks for your
concern.Our house has recently been peed
in a few times by Baby Toddler Snot and now it smells a bit like a cat’s litter box
when you first open the door, but you don’t really notice it after awhile.
I have been out for a few bicycle rides as usual.I also received a neutral to mildly favorable
review in someone else’s blog’s comments, which reminds me of this awesome song
that I recently witnessed one of my idols, Mr. Alford Yankovitch, perform recently.
Here is the aforementioned review:
Anonymous said...
While the Snobs away, we could read
Bike Snot OMA (Omaha) instead. He is the opposite of the snob:
"it took me back to my goodle
days of life in a large desert town. I lived in a crack neighborhood in a
trailer in the side lot of Jim’s place, next to the bus. I met crack whores
aplenty and witnessed some unabashed prostituting to buy the shiny crystalline
substance. I worked crappy jobs, played my guitar, and cranked up the swamp
cooler and drank Red Dog in my trailer while watching Phoenix Coyote hockey on
the tv to cool off in the heat of the late afternoon/early evening. Ahhh! That
felt cool!"
Well, thanks, I guess.This is also what I told my father-in-law when he informed me that he had
purchased me a ticket to an upcoming Great White/Warrant concert. Usually when I am quoted it's not as accurately, nor in as much detail. In fact most of my friends try to politely ignore my web-based journaling hobby and/or ask me questions like "What motivates you to spend so much time doing that?" Well, the answer is - I like to bicycle, and I like to express myself. But I am not very good at either of them, so I work at the museum gift shopette.
In real news, Hope Solo and her gang of hooligan jocks are preparing to attack Nadeshiko – Aya Miyami and her fellow Onna-bugeisha. Also, I think there might be some bicycling and/or bicycling-related opportunities available in the near future.
The Owl Ride is in a week or so (July 11).
RAGBRAI is coming up soon. Tour de France is happening. There are a pair of French bicyclers who are bicycling across the U.S. This last
event reminds me of my goal of crossing the English Channel on a paddle bike.
This
will be exhilarating and nearly as relaxing as bicycling on rural gravel
roads. Afterwards I will paddlebike my
way to Germany and enjoy the Rhine River’s quaint castle-hostels and delicious
beers, wines, and goats, as advertised by the worldly Rick Steves. I will attempt
to convince Mrs. Snot, Teen Snot, and Toddler Snot to join me on this venture
on a four-seated, tandem-style paddle bike - a kind of river serpent (i.e., a naga) with moderately flexible connections, but I’m not sure they’ll go for
it. Luckily Toddler Snot is fairly
agreeable to adventures of any sort, as long as they don’t involve a lot of
fireworks, so I think I’ll at least have a co-pilot.
Afterwards I will find a swamp and start a swamp-paddlebike
fishing business, which I assume will be hard to market, but unrewarding.
My future’s so bright I’m pulling my hat down over my eyes and taking a nap.
