Hey honchos and honchoettes! What is your poison? Or would you prefer to pick your passion? Yes! I like it!
As a keen occasional observer of bicycle media, I have recently become aware that a former professional bicycler, one Sir Lancelot Armingstrong, about whom I have typed about previously, has admitted to being on drugs. Well, that's what they called it back when I was in junior high. Now it's apparently called "doping." Semantics aside, I feel that this is a wake up call for all of us bicyclers to admit stuff. I would like to follow Sir Lancelot's lead and admit that I too have been on drugs/doping for much of the time I have been bicycling these past 6 years or so. Before that I was on drugs all the time whether or not I was bicycling. My bicycling dopes of choice have been valium and ritalin prescribed for me by my family doctor, Dr. Nick. The valium keeps me calm and the ritalin keeps me focused and alert. And if I drink one beer I get all fuzzy and usually black out. It's a win-win-win! Except now I feel guilty since I just told you about it, oh my surrogate Oprah! Ah the guilt! But I feel better too. How about you? Why not admit something? It'll be great!
A friend of mine, also named Nick, gave me this awesome tail light for my birthed day.
It looks fantastic! Kind of like a traveling, personal bike lane! You should get one too! Here's a review of what seems to be a similar product.
I must now somewhat regretfully inform you that I will be unable to attend to my irregular internettal diary-ing for approximately one month. I will be undergoing some soul-searching and online rehabbing following my being on drugs for so long. I might also take some drugs. I will get back to you with all the results ASAP! Now I've really got to get to work on that fan letter to Pentax! You've probably got better things to do too! Admit it!
Hey Januarians! What's new? Good, good. Hmmm. Not so good? Balanced. Creaky?
You will be surprised to hear that my Pentax camera was entombed in a snowy state of suspension for the past three weeks. But today it got up to 10 degrees Centigrelcius (50 degrees F-ing-height). And it rained. And this is what I found when I went back to the location where I had taken my last photo with my trusty P-tax.
Can you say "Whooo-hooo!"? Well I sure did! And just out of curiosity I flicked the power switch and she fired right up!? As you can imagine, I am thrilled by this minorly miraculous turn of events and I am planning on writing Pentax a heartfelt fan letter. I was so excited I took a few blurry photos,
blurrified by some condensation which cleared up pretty quickly.
Here is the environment in which I dropped the P-ax.
The snow picked up and it got buried. The multiple-use trail was plowed preternaturally quickly. The P got buried in a ridge formed by the eager plow. Then it melted out with nary a scratch on her sleek, matte, boxy body. And it was sitting there waiting for me like a nicely chilled bottle of Bean-o or, if you prefer, vino! Alright enough rhapsodizing about my camera already.
What have you been up to? Checking your air pressure? Spraying stuff with Pam to prevent sludge adhesion? Neat!
So as you know Giant is a popular supplier of bicycles, primarily to bicyclers. Some would say a bicycle pusher. I used to think that their bikes were a great value, but now I just don't know. Haven't checked. Until now. And you know that Gangnam-style is a jam made popular by Corean rapper PSY. But, did you know that PSY loves to RIDE GIANT bicycles and that Giant is also a popular Corean television program depicting spies and intrigue and such? And Chick Corea isn't actually Corean or even a chick? Well it is. Here's my favorite clip so far.
So let's get Corazy and bicycle around y'all!
And let's not forget to pop a wheelie or two!
And keep looking down! You might find something valuable that has thawed out of a snow ridge! Bad dog!
Hello 2013! What mysteries and excitement do you hold? 2013 has been a special year for me in that I may or may not have resorted to selling bodily fluids in order to supplement my income as a bowling ball and ball accessories salesmanmachine and to support my camera-loosing/abusing habit. In any case, 'twas the 4th day of January of '13 that I found myself in a bodily fluid procurement establishment staring at this magazine.
Ah, what memories the sight of this magazine did elicit in my mind! Why, Bicycling magazine was the magazine that informed me of the length of Miguel Indurain's quadraceps and the importance of carb loading! Where would I be without this knowledge? I do not care to reflect upon this sad hypothetical situation any longer, thank you very much! This specific magazine cover seems to be the one that has been featured in many Bicycling magazine advertisements. Or else the covers are mostly virtually identical.
This issue had the top 50 bicycling cities in the Union of Statelinesses, which we reefer to as the U.S., for 2010. Minneapolis was #1. Yes. Minneapolis is apparently an awesome place to live. Hell, their North
American football team isn't even as sucky as usual this year. Let's all go to Minny-ville!
Some of my favorite things from Minneapolis are 1. Mark Mallman, 2. The Hold Steady, 3. Wendy and Lisa Loni Anderson Tippi Hedron Prince.
The article revealed that in the big M there are often plenty of ice hazards to be aware of while cheerily spinning about town, all red-cheeky and snotty. Also lots of bicyclers and related shops, co-ops and a gang or two.
When I was six I was in a spear-chucking bike gang. Unfortunately we were outmatched by the non-bicycling, rock-throwing gang that lived down the street. Maybe it was the fact that our spears were maybe a 1/2-inch diameter, 4-foot-long, slightly sharpened sticks that didn't fly straight. A variation of this type of gang apparently exists in Minneapolis, but instead of using crooked, unwieldy sticks they whack each other with 2x4s! So if you don't get your fill of head-impacting collisions while out icecycling you can join a real bicycle gang and/or get one upside the head! Sweet!
If there are two things that bicyclers often enjoy more than actual bicycling, they are talking about bicycling and watching movies about bicycling. Fortunately there may be an opportunity for both of these activities during the upcoming viewing of Reveal the Path at Aksarben Cinema at 7 p.m.on Thursday February 21. There may also by a 2x4 head-whacking-fun-fest after the show. But only if it's as icy as the wintry streets of Minneapolis. It's like hockey on bikes.
Let's slide!
It is likely to have escaped your notice that my last post did not have any photos or videos, so here!
