Freedoming down the holiday

July 7, 2014

As Bob Seeger has ofttimes intoned, "It seems like yesterday but it was long ago" in this case about 2 days ago.  Hope you had a great weekend and a good start to the dog days your week!

July 4, 2014

Here in the US of usiness we’ve got a little tradition we call F-off overbearing imperialist swine, also known as Independence Day or the Fourth of July.  It’s pretty fucking great.  There is a lot of noise.  We blow shit up.  We play music.  We blow more shit up.  Did you have a pleasant and/or explosive holiday?  Mine has been great and there’s still 1.25 hours left!  What did I do?  Well shucks, I’m kinda shy about sharing.  Alright, you talked me into it!  First I woke up and went with Mrs. Snot and Baby Toddler Snot to a parade.  It was great!  It was also kind of hot and by the time we were finished we were ready for the popsicles being handed out.  Unfortunately Baby Toddler Snot was not able to really bite into the popsicle due to his rather sparse dentition (2 out of 4 upper canines).  So I ate the popsicle.  Then he looked sad and needy and requested ice cream.  So I feet-flopped it back to the in-laws and grabbed some ice cream.  He didn’t really seem to want any so I ate all the ice cream.  Then I got home and re-roped and flagged our flag pole using wire, a section of a roof rake, plenty of duct tape and mason’s line.  It was pretty exciting stuff, let me tell you!  But wait, Mr. Popiel, there’s more!  Then I went for a bicycle ride to Chalco Hills where I enjoyed a lovely outdoor concert by the Swingtones and the Nebraska Wind Symphony.  Here are some highlights.  

This lovely couple had a bike trailer built for (and hauling) two!

The trailer is an Instep.

Narragansett Del's Shandy was awesome!  Thanks!

Eric Williams is the Papio-Missouri River NRD's new Trail Guy!  Here's the e-version of this Spring issue of Spectrum.  Can't wait for summer edition!

 Unfortunately these video highlights were purely sonic in nature since I was too lazy to get off my keister to get any decent video footage, but I didn't really want to be that f-ing guy with his butt blocking my view of the festivities.  And yes, that is Miss Majorette of Nebraska twirling that baton! 

After the concert I rode my bike to our family rendezvous under the golden arches.  On the way I saw a herd of deer.  I pedaled back home with fireworks exploding incessantly in most, if not all, directions.  It was great! 

Now I am here at home and enjoying some air conditioning, Bruce Springsteen (of course), and cheap (non-homophobic-Russian) vodka (also of course). 

So what have you been up to?  Are you going on the Owl Ride coming up in just over less than a week (July 12)?  I am kind of strapped for cash right now so I may not be able to actually register (unless you wanna loan me 30 bucks, trust me, I’m good for it!) but I may happen to be out bicycling on some of the same roads by happenstance. 

Here is a bicycle rack at an undisclosed location that I used the other day that I was not really impressed with.

What else is happening?  I am not sure, but I hope to hear all about it the next time we meet up. 

How about the United Stateses roles in the world?  Well, I think Omaha’s role (at least nationally) has grown somewhat to include irritating baseball coaches whose teams can’t hit as many home runs as they would like due to the strong seasonal winds from the south we experience here during June/July.  To these complainers I say “Haha!”  I also say maybe you should practice batting while pedaling a bicycle because then you will tend to have some wind blowing in your face and you may develop a more powerful swing after the first few obligatory scrapes and bruises. 

But back to the USA’s roll in the world’s cup.  Well we our national futbol team won a few futbol con accente juegos and then we our boys lost to Belgium.  That is okay.  I think our national team will improve rapidly as soon as they begin playing futbol con bicicletes or “wheeled soccer” as we will come to know and love to call it as we gradually expand our imperialistic tendencies towards grabbing the world’s cup. 

Speaking of cups, have you been wearing yours lately?  There was this one time when I was playing a pick-up game of soccer without a cup and the ball hit me in a rather sensitive area of my anatomy (i.e., my ‘nads).  After I slowly recovered (about 2 minutes), I swore I would never play the world’s favorite sport ever again and it turned out I was actually able to procreate.  I also don’t often watch soccer, but when I do I watch it it’s in a bar with a Tecate (or some other type of beer).  

Alright!  Grab your ball or balls, get out there and pedal and you are sure to be a wiener/winner and/or reach your GOOOOAAAAAL!  What is this obsolete attempts at humour amateur eve!?  Hey!  F-you imperialist swine!  Freeeduuuummm!