Cross! My heart!

November 2, 2011

Today was an exciting day for me, in a way. Parts of the day were gloomy and dark. Then it snowed, which I didn't really think would happen, since I regard weather forecasts (especially when it comes to precipitation) with unrelenting suspicion.

"It looks like small children are throwing eyeballs from heaven." I remarked to a colleague.
He looked at me warily, as we both continued guzzling the company swill and twitching.

By the time 5:00 rolled around I was unable to focus and tensely happy as I jumped on my bicycle, heart-thumping double-time, to head out for cyclo-cross witnessing. I observed the daytime resting place of Team Homunculus, the members of which rise at sunset for ghoulishly prowling the streets and bars of the city, on the lookout for spandex and Jaegermeister.

I made it to the cyclo-cross just in time to scan portions of the course and observe the start.

This event took place at Seymour Smith Park, where I had last witnessed some disc golfing. I was struck by the similarities: both activities involved round objects that rolled, spun freely in midair, and sometimes became entrapped within metal frames.

I observed many of the things I expected to see, including bicycles sliding around over slippery terrain, rapid mounting and dismounting of bicycles, and splashing through standing water. I also felt somewhat fortunate to observe two bicycles crashing and becoming entangled after the leader biffed it on a slippery corner. I was underwhelmed by some boards (maybe 2x8s or 2x10s) placed approximately 12 feet apart across the trail as obstacles. Most of the racers dismounted and jumped them, although the leader of the "A" group and a couple other cyclists bunny-hopped them and seemed to gain considerable time in doing so. Although these obstacles succeeded in causing most riders to dismount and then remount with an uncomfortable-looking impact between saddle and a portion of the anatomy apparently very close to the perineum, I was hoping for some kind of large wooden log A-frame for them to climb. Mark Savery (who is over 40-how's that for a kick to your perineum you young scallywags!) was the winner of the A-group. The "B" group raced for a half-hour, whereas the "A" group had to keep it up for one hour. Swan Bentley was fastest to finish in the B-group.  I asked a B-grouper how it was, and he stated that it was fun, but that he couldn't feel his toes.

I noted a variety of drive-trains, including single and double chain rings and even a single-speed (I think it was a Salsa Chili con Crosso).

A few things that I didn't see were a flat handlebar, a costume, a flask of brandy, or a beer tent. Oh, and no one dismounting by putting their right foot between their left leg and the bike frame (per USAC recommendations). I'm pretty sure they were just messing with me and all of the other clueless researchers into the mist-shrouded realm of cyclocrossing.

It appeared to be a competitive race under challenging conditions. Top 10 finishers in the A-group got to split $350 in prize money. So they're not in it for the money. Fun to watch. Probably pretty fun to participate. Another race occurs at the same place in a week!  Let's cross!